You have cancer

On Monday 26th January, I was told that I had lung cancer and that it was too far gone to be cured. I took the news calmly and clinically, and asked a lot of questions. When I finally left the doctors' surgery 2 hours later, the first thing I did was call my best friend Adam and try to tell him the news. Many people, him included, knew that I had gone for the results of my latest endoscopic biopsy. After being so calm in with both doctors whom I saw separately along with their entourage of "supporting" nurses and counsellors, I broke down. I paced up and down between Warren St and Goodge St stations, undecided whether to go to my medical friend John's place, or to East Finchley where I was house-sitting, or to Rob and Alex (very close friends), or to my own home to be with my lodgers to whom I felt really close. In the end, I caught the victoria line to London Victoria and got hold of Rob and asked him to meet me at the station. Sitting on the train, I kept crying, then stopping, then crying again. I am not going to go on about the myriad emotions I and my friends went through that night or the next few days as I told other friends and family, but suffice it to say, the support was and still is, amazing.

I have since had 2 sessions of chemotherapy, something I would not wish upon my worst enemy (not that I have any). However, I should not complain as I am in the best hands, have the most amazingly loving and supportive friends and family. Everyone has been just great and this is a journey that I shall not have to travel alone.

My next chemo session is on Wednesday 24th February.